What Every Man Needs To Know by Weathersby Darnell & Donohue Steven & Marshall Robert

Author:Weathersby, Darnell & Donohue, Steven & Marshall, Robert [Weathersby, Darnell]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-07-01T16:00:00+00:00

Loving the Boy IS Loving the Man

We were all children once. Some of you reading this may be younger than voting age, drinking age, or have felt the warmth of romantic love. All of you are men to be, if not already, have stepped into what is known as manhood. You will have expectations beyond measure. You will feel immense pressure, both self-induced and societally induced upon you. You will feel that you are responsible for more than you can name or remember. Your actions will hold a weight that bears more considerable significance than you'll be able to calculate. My heart goes out to you; the transition is rarely smooth and always seems sudden. Even writing this makes me reflect on my hellacious transition. I still have days where I have to take a long hard look at myself. Check myself in the mirror and hold myself accountable. You formulate relationships where you believe that you are going to receive all the elements of love (respect, forgiveness, compassion, and humility). Still, quite often, we will only experience a few of these until we establish our worth.

When we see children, we have the instinct to love them. Our expectations of them are much more minimal, rightfully so. But at what point does a boy lose his innocence? When is the boy now responsible for their decisions, actions, emotions, and expression? Is there a line that we cross that we didn't notice? Was it progressive, and we were too busy to notice? There are three distinct titles that all men receive throughout their lives. There is the boy, the guy, and the man. This book, in its essence, is designed to be a beacon of information and inspiration for all men. But what about those that are stuck? Those unsure of themselves, and have not yet developed all of the attributes laid out in Chapter 1?

The journey to manhood can seem so lonely. The loneliness carries with it a sense of unfamiliarity and the desire to fit in. It is the rut of boys trying to figure out how to graduate to being guys, and all of the guys pretending to be men until they figure it out. So, what am I saying? I am saying that men are generally unaware that they are men and, in turn, don't realize that they may be stuck emotionally in either a boy phase or a guy phase. There are no master men; they don't exist. Even myself writing this is no example of a perfectly mastered man. That is part of the problem that we put against ourselves, which in turn supplies life to our insecurities and our feelings of unworthiness of love.

When society sees a young boy, they don't know the man that that boy will become. In part, it is hard to truly understand who you are when you are developing and maturing. But, in retrospection, you can look back at your life and see several defining moments that give you the confidence and may inspire you to keep moving in a particular direction.

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